How to Live in the Present

I was wondering recently how one would possibly challenge and encourage a friend who was struggling.  A friend who was constantly slipping back to dwelling in painful experiences of the past, and reliving the hurt and frustration.

What would you say?

What if the friend was genuinely trying to move on, yet still tripping over the very sources of the pain whenever they crossed his or her path?  What if every day images and memories swam into view without warning or invitation?

Answers for a situation like this can be varied, but the simple, straightforward answer that sums all others up is this-

Live in the present.

I didn’t want to tackle this subject mostly because I don’t feel very capable.  I don’t by any means have it figured out.  In fact, I only just grasped the full meaning of the principle a few days ago.

I am that friend needing answers.  I am the one needing to be told, “live in the present”.  So, here I am giving myself some advice, and if it is a help to anyone else, then great!

1. Give your past a kick

OK, so maybe not literally.  But honestly, say goodbye to the things not worth remembering.  Whether it’s old sin, people who wronged you or whatever, move on!  Nothing is worth harboring.  In the case of past sins and regrets, if you have repented before God and made any wrongs right, than you are forgiven!  “As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” Psalm 103:12

Now, I cannot pretend here that everything is going to magically disappear.  It doesn’t.  I personally know a few newer Christians who have dealt and are still dealing with the consequences of past sins. The effects of formication, drugs, felonies, etc., don’t just go away.  It can take years, if ever.  Yet, as Christians we walk in newness of life, with the knowledge that we are clean in the blood of Jesus. He gives strength and grace for the journey of one who is dealing with the effects of an ugly past. Every day with Christ is one step further from where you used to be.

2. Say goodbye to hindsight

A long time ago I once wrote in a notebook the rough draft for a piece about hindsight.  Do you think that I could find it now?  Of course not.  In hindsight, I should have organized my writing a bit better so that I could find old writing when I needed it.

What I just said there is about the only good use for hindsight.  It can help us do better the next time.  Beyond that, it is mostly useless since we cannot change the past.  So say goodbye permanently to the what ifs, and the should haves, would haves, and could haves.  They won’t do you any good.  If you are trusting in God, He has a reason for everything that happens in your life.  Don’t panic, because He never makes a mistake.  Let Him have the drivers seat, and enjoy the ride looking forward!  Wouldn’t it be awfully silly if we drove down the highway looking behind rather than ahead?

3.  Embrace the life you have today

There isn’t a place in the Bible where we are told to live in the past.  Neither should we live in the future.  Granted there are things we must tend to for the future, it is not to be our focus.

Each new day God has given is a chance to start fresh.  Don’t build today with broken pieces of yesterday!  Begin your day with prayer (believe me, it works wonders!), and line yourself up with God’s word.  Embrace a spirit of thankfulness and joy; an attitude of praise to the One Who made you.

4.  Choose the right weapons for your battles

I know that might sound funny, but imagine this for a moment.  In a video game, the characters sometimes are equipped with a few weapons to combat the enemy, and individual weapons are for certain conflicts. You have to choose the right weapon when an enemy is approaching.  Obviously, a video game isn’t real life, but you get the idea. 🙂

Now comparing that example to our life’s battles, we must choose the right weapon to combat the “enemy of our souls” who is attacking.  I first discovered this nearly two years ago when I was struggling in my thought life.  I began to combat the enemy’s dart by taking the opportunity to pray for someone. Whenever I started having struggles in my mind, I used it as a spring board to lift someone up in prayer.  It took my mind off what I shouldn’t have been thinking about immediately!

And prayer isn’t the only weapon.  It could be quoting scripture, reading your Bible, or anything else you can come up with.  If it slays the enemy, then it’s the right weapon!

5. Do something productive

This little principle has been the most influential in getting me away from my past hurts and troubles.  There is nothing like a challenging  and productive activity to distract you from what otherwise would bog you down.

There are hundreds of things to do. Find a fun, (or not so fun) project and tackle it!  A few weeks ago I decided to finish mudding the drywall in a small closet of ours.  It was much more difficult than I anticipated!  After a week of taking a break, I may have the courage to attempt the last coat of mud.

6.  Be involved in the life of someone else

One of the best ways to keep yourself out of any pity parties is to focus on the needs and wants of others.  Seek to bless someone else every day, even if its just something small.  Offer to help your mom, read your younger sibling a story, bring your dad a drink while he is working.  You will find the opportunities are endless when you start to look around!

I am not going to lie-this “living in the present” thing hasn’t fully sunk into me yet.  Like I said, I am giving myself this advice.  I need it badly.  Not too long ago I had to come face to face with something that had hurt me, and it was really hard.  It pushed me to the limit and made me mad all over again.  Mad at the cause.  Mad at myself.

Maybe I need to give that past experience a better kick.

Actually, I need to stop reliving and thinking about what hurt me.  I need to live for today, in the moment.  The next time I have to deal with it will be better.

To sum this up, set your sights on Jesus! Seek Him first, and everything else will fall into place.  Don’t worry about what happened last year, or yesterday, or what will come tomorrow, or next year. Embrace today-the day God has given you.

How Heavy is your Burden?

A lecturer once, while explaining stress management to an audience, lifted a glass of water and asked, “How heavy is this glass of water?”

Answers from the audience ranged from 2 to 5 pounds.  The lecturer replied, “The actual weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.”

He continued, “If I hold it for a minute, that’s pretty easy. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll get an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a whole day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case, the weight remains the same. Yet, the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on. As with the glass of water, you have to put it down.

I came to this revelation 2 weeks ago during a Friday night prayer meeting.  Brother Rob was praying, and he essentially was laying his burdens down for the Lord to carry.  I was convicted as I listened, and then, suddenly, the light came on.  I was carrying burdens too!

That explained my recent weariness; my lack of zeal and energy.  I was drained emotionally and often frustrated for no good reason.  My poor mind was absolutely exhausted.  All because I was trying to figure out situations outside of my control.

In Pilgrim’s Progress we see that Christian, before he got to the cross, had an enormous burden. He journeyed for a long time with that pack strapped to his back.  When he finally arrived at the cross, it miraculously fell off, and rolled away.

The conversion experience of every born again christian is like that. I remember clearly the feeling of heavy bricks rolling off my shoulders when I finally yielded completely to Christ.

There are many different types of burdens. They can include sin (that was Christian’s pack), self-inflicted troubles, and circumstances we cannot control.  Yet, no matter the type of burden, God has a place of rest and peace for His children.  There is a way out.

It is the burden of things outside of my control that I seem to struggle with the most.  I am a thinker, an analyzer and a logical person.  I like things best when they make sense.

Lately things just haven’t been making sense.  At times it is just plain confusing.

But that is according to my thinking, and my logic.  I think the Bible might have something to say about that…

In the days following that prayer night, I thought often about my burden and how I was really going to get rid of it.  If only turning off your crazy mind was as easy as flicking a light switch.  Wouldn’t that make life so much simpler?

I have come to see that prayer is the best answer for any circumstance.  It really does work!  For the next few days I made a point to hide in my closet every day to talk to God.  And do you know what?  He met me there!  Not only that, the burden disappeared.

Am I still having struggles?  Yes, at times I am. Yet, I learned that I don’t have to understand all the why’s and how’s of the situations I face.  If God is in control, my job is to simply trust Him with everyone I care about, and everything I think needs to be fixed.  No amount of my rationalizing is going to help.  I came to the point when, just as in the water glass example, I could no longer bear the load.

As you can see, it doesn’t really matter how heavy our burdens are.  The problem is how long we carry them, whether knowingly or unaware.

In Psalms 5:22 it says, “Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee.”

And in Matthew 11:28 & 30, “Come unto me, all he that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you.. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

His burden is light and easy compared to our heavy, fleshly “packs”.  Why would we even want to carry them?  All we need to do is drop our load at His feet, take a hold of His yoke and follow Him.